Saturday 29 November 2008

Ideas in the Night, and Seeing my Work in Print


Funny how so many of my creative ideas and writing thoughts for my blog come while I'm putting J to bed, and can't immediately get them down on paper. His bedtime routine takes up to an hour, although it's been swifter lately since I've figured out the feeding-him-to-sleep-in-the-Ergo trick. It must be my equivalent of 'having ideas in the shower'.

With an average of eight wakings per night, for 14 months, I reckon that to be about 2000 times I've responded to J in the night. Whew. Every one of those interactions, or at least the cumulative effect of all that consistent night-time parenting, must be instilling some sort of security, right?

I wonder. Another mom was telling me how her 10 month old just doesn't seem to notice whether she is there or not, and is happy as long as there is stuff going on and other people to interact with. He doesn't seem to have hit the 7-month-separation-anxiety stage that J seemed to have virtually from birth (and it only worsened at 7 months). Another mom remarked, "Oh, it's because he's so secure. You've made him so secure." And I thought, what, and I haven't, because he cries every time I leave the room? I don't think so.

It seems they are all different, and we just work out our individual strategies to deal with it. I now almost enjoy my 'quiet time' with J when he wakes up and I get to enjoy his cuddliness, and also just try to be in the moment. I sing mantra's to him sometimes so that doubles up as spiritual practice I guess ;) Multi-tasking and all that.

Yesterday I received a copy of Juno magazine in the post - the winter issue in which my article 'Ten Months on: Surrendering to the Shifting Tides of Motherhood' appears. An odd feeling to see photo's of me and J, and actually read my words in print. As usual I devoured the rest of the magazine, a brilliant one, and was inspired by its articles on the research behind home education and on the role of media advertising in children's upbringing. I feel proud to be part of a publication that provides such a welcome contrast to the mainstream parenting magazine industry, which all too often focuses on 'controlling' children and improving their 'behaviour', rather than looking at them as whole beings. I'm re-reading the brilliant Unconditional Parenting by Alfie Kohn and his thoughts on behaviourism and why it shouldn't be applied to human beings, are sobering indeed. I feel freshly resolved to commit to the 'path less taken' as far as discipline is concerned.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

So, there actually is a magazine called JUNO? Did you know that we named our son Juno? (AND you had an article printed in it?) Do you know where I can buy it on the internet?

Anonymous said...

Ah, so you do carry J in a ergo aswell!

Heidi said...

I responded to your lovely comment on my blog but wanted to write here too in case you missed it. Just to say I'm glad you introduced yourself and am looking forward to exploring more commonality. I'm enjoying your blog, and loved the poetry I listened to on your myspace page. Wonderful to find another writer and spirit seeker.

Barefoot Mama said...

Hey Morgan,
I can't really find a place to email you so sorry if this isn't very 'commenty'!

Just wanted to say I really enjoyed your article in Juno, it echoed a lot of my thoughts recently about the transition into motherhood and the seemingly chaotic flowing form of being it necessitates. I live in Forest Row, East Grinstead and had my son (now 16 months) almost straight after university. I studied English at Nottingham, and want to pursue article, creative and travel writing but having been in baby loop am lacking confidence! I was wandering if you could let me know about your writing courses in Brighton.

My number is 01342 825201 and email is jessicastewart123@hotmailcom.

Many thanks, looking forward to hearing from you.

Jessica

Anonymous said...

hello morganmoon.was really refreshed to read your flowing soulful article in juno.i believe and write about and... talk about similar issues.we should link to each others blogs??: earthparent.blogspot.com. be great to hear from you. holly

MorganMoon said...

Hi Jessica and Holly! I'm glad you enjoyed the article in Juno and could identify with some of the ideas. Holly, I will certainly check your blog out!